Galatians 5: 22 says: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, long suffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self control.

From gossiping to the words one speaks to lying to just how one acts says so much about ones character. As I read through this current chapter in one of my books, it is quite clear God has got some work to do with me. Words, actions, and my tone clearly make me look bad! I also know my mood, my actions, my character has a way of setting others mood, and actions as well. (not for the positive either!)
Today I look at my character, my words, my actions and they only show an angry person. Though I am angry and tired with this job, only putting out 1/2 the effort is not the person I want to be. For whatever reason, God  still has me planted here at this job. So as I tell my kiddos, time to put on my big girl undies and just deal with it.  No more asking “Why God Why”, but more of, “how can do better where I am?” Time to stop relying on my understanding and have faith in God.  Proverbs 3:7-8says  “Do not be wise in your own eyes: Fear the Lord and depart from evil. It will be health to your flesh and strength to your bones. “
Its interesting, I think of my own children that always ask, “Why mommy, why mommy, why” on and on like broken records. Their have been times I have just had to say, “Because I said SO!!”. Perhaps God is tired of my “Why, God, Why” and now I all I can hear “Is because I SAID SO.” Not the words I am seeking from God, my father, but I am sure the lack of faith I have been showing is not what he wants from me either.
Today I ask God to help me to think of my moods, my words, and my tone prior to taking any action. I will also continue to thank Him for unsettling me,:
“Your touch to the deepest parts of me – dark and dingy and hidden away too long….Goodbye to my remnants, my rationalizations, shards, and tendencies. This is not who I am nor who I was created to be. Goodbye to shallow love, sharp words, self-pity, and suspicious fears. I am an unsettled woman who no longer wishes to take part in your distractions or destruction’s. Welcome, deeper love, new possibilities, unleashed intimacy, and the certainty I am held.”