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The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines self-pity as: “pity for oneself; especially: a self-indulgent dwelling on one’s own sorrows or misfortunes”

We all have gotten to this point, we have sunk down to the level of simply feeling sorry for ourselves. A bad day, bad month, or even bad year(s). Micah 7:1-2: “Woe is me! I am like the one who gathers summer fruit, when the vines have been gleaned There is no cluster to eat, no early fig that I crave. The faithful have vanished from the earth, no mortal is just! They all lie in wait to shed blood, each one ensnares the other.” Oh woe is me!

Self-Pity is another bad habit. It can lead to depression, lead to feeling defeated, lead to feelings of worthless ness and despair. It is a habit that the devil likes and dances on the sidelines cheering us as we go down this road. It’s a habit that takes our focus away from God, leaving us questioning if God is really there. Psalm 13:1 “How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hind your face from me?”

For years I lived with the self-pity attitude. My first husband was addicted to porn, and verbally abusive. Through-out my marriage and years after we have separated I carried that self-pity burden. Woe is me, I lived with that. Woe is me, I have low self-esteem. Woe is me, I am not good enough. The list can go on and on…

What do we do? What can we do? We can look to God.

  1. Learn to recognize when we are beginning to sink into self-pity
  2. Find a verse in the bible that shows you the promise of God’s word.

–      Philippians 4:13 “I can do all things through him who strengthens me.

–      Matthew 11:28-30 “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”

  1. Give it to God. Let go of the anger, the hurt feelings, and simply forgive and let go.
  2. Start to have a grateful heart. Begin to look for things to thank God for, even the smallest of things.

The next time you start down the path of self-pity, stop, look to God and breathe knowing He is God.


I just want to thank you for Your love and for all you do for us. Lord I ask that you teach us to open our hearts to you, allowing us to come to you when self-pity tries to take hold. Abba, I ask that you give each of us discernment, wisdom and guidance to know when self-pity is begin to enter our minds, and show us your all-consuming love so that we can let self-pity go and not allow it to take root.