Its been a few months since I have attempted to blog. Words have been at the tips of my fingers…in my mind….even typed out on the screen, but are soon put away and deleted. It seemed as though I, who is not a writer by any means, had writers block and well my writing, blogging, took a break.
For months striving has been on my mind. People are striving to get a degree from college, to get the great paying job, to get the new car, the big house and even keep up with the Jones. You have to go to school. You have to get a good paying job.
So I keep hearing:
- “What are you striving for?” Me?…I want my Masters in Accounting. I want my Masters in Theology.
- “Why?” To “feel” smarter and to be taken seriously.
There it is, I am striving for recognition. I am allowing my own insecurities to run wild. I am trying to prove myself to people.
So I have decided to be still. I have desisted. Not an easy thing to do, but faith has allowed me to just wait!
Even though I felt as if cleanings and renewing has been put on the back burner, Abba has been cleansing! He is cleaning out my old mindsets where I am think I can do whatever with a degree. He is showing me, teaching ,me that it is through God that I can do whatever.